The good life is the goal of many people.
A life where you can lie on the beach and soak up the sun. Sipping a cold drink while eating delicious food, the sound of the waves crashing in your background.
A life where you can explore the outdoors to your heart’s content — whether it’s going camping in the mountainside or going diving into the deep blue ocean sea.
A life where money is not an issue — where your bills magically pays itself. Where you can buy whatever you want without worrying too much about the price tag. Where you can give your family & friends something nice once in a while.
A life surrounded by meaningful connections. Where you spend hours or even days in each other’s company, dissecting each other’s thoughts and lives. You would share your deepest darkest thoughts, and unravel your vulnerabilities through every piercing sentence.
All those things seem amazing, right?
Well, it was for me for a while too.
But nowadays I have come to realise, that the good life just doesn’t cut it anymore.
That realisation has slowly been creeping up on me over the years. But it wasn’t until recently that it fully hit me.
See, I’ve been doing my Masters of Psychology in the UK for the past year. Originally from Malaysia, I’ve always been amazed by Europe every time I’m there.
The infrastructure is impressive. From well-connected transportation networks that link up cities, to the integrated digital financial services which have replaced paper money (in most Western Europe countries).
The European social model is the envy of many countries. Universal healthcare provides each citizen with the right to free lifelong medical care. Generous welfare programmes such as unemployment insurance, retirement pensions and public housing provide a safety net for the underprivileged.
The provision and access to good, high-quality education for free or reduced fees allows education to be easily accessible.
The strong labor protections and regulations allows workers to demand decent pay and good working conditions, promoting great work-life balance.
Coming from Asia, there’s plenty to be loved about Europe. So it’s no surprise, every time I meet a friend that lives in Europe, they ask me this question.
“Are you considering moving permanently to Europe ?”
Moving to Europe would perhaps mean a better life for me.
Additional to all the plus points I mentioned above… I would also be able to earn in a better currency. With a bigger spending power, I would be able to travel around the world easier. And for someone who loves to travel, that’s a HUGE plus.
Despite all that, I can’t help but notice this nagging feeling deep down.
It whispers,
“Something is missing.”
Something bigger than myself.
Let’s rewind a little to give you the full picture.
Before pursuing my Masters in the UK, I was working in the mental health space in Malaysia.
In Malaysia, and most Asian countries, mental health is still highly stigmatised. A taboo topic. Spoken in hushed tones, behind closed doors.
Mental health issues are swept under the rug. The rug might be overflowing, yet they don’t dare to bring it out in the open. Its too embarrassing, too vulnerable, too raw.
Asian culture is big on ‘saving face’. In Chinese culture, the concept of ‘face’, AKA mianzi (mi-an-ze), refers to the amount of “dignity” or “prestige” that’s associated with an individual. So, ‘saving face’ means keeping others from losing respect for oneself or avoiding embarrassment.
People are not willing to discuss mental health issues, especially in public spaces, because they will “lose face”.
A huge part of my work is to break the stigma against mental illnesses. I do that by talking openly about my experience as a caregiver to my bipolar father.
I pivoted my relatively successful corporate career and found my purpose in mental health. More specifically, building the mental healthcare system in Malaysia, so people like my father, do not have to suffer in silence.
See, once you have found your purpose in life, it fuels you, unlike any other motivation. Having a purpose in life means having a sense of direction and meaning. It means knowing what you want to achieve and why it matters.
Having a purpose pulls you to live a life that is bigger than yourself.
My life is no longer just about me living the good life. Sure, it’s nice to have the elements of a good life, where I don’t have to worry about finances, have great relationships and spend a great deal of time in nature.
I still strive to have a good life. But ever since I found my purpose in mental health, I crave for a fulfilled life.
A fulfilled life is one where I work towards achieving my purpose. Even if it means I might have to give up the good life for now.
Some may find their purpose in parenthood, by bringing life into this world and raising their children up to be good people.
Some may find their purpose in building an innovative startup that brings solutions to millions of people across the globe.
Once you find that purpose, it seems like the only thing that matters is to live your life as an expression of that purpose.
Purpose fuels your actions to be birthed from the soul. It originates from the deepest corners of your being.
Everything else will fall short.
Even the ‘good life’.
“When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy.”
Rumi
This article was originally published on Medium.
